John’s story

We helped John care for his wife, Rachel, and cope with grief. This is his story…

“Rachel, my wife, was a remarkable woman. She did a degree in French and art history. She had an eye for beautiful things! After running a successful business as an Alexander Technique instructor, she began an art foundation course at our local college and started to paint and draw.

Rachel was first diagnosed with breast cancer in 2009 and received successful treatment. During her recovery, she came to Longfield for complementary therapies and group support. Unfortunately, ten years later, she found another lump, which was also treated and left her well. Sadly, four more years on, she discovered the cancer had travelled all over her body. She had chemotherapy but it made her so ill. There came a point where she couldn’t take it anymore.

Rachel wanted to die at home and we were so grateful for the support from Longfield’s carers. The team came three times a day. All of the carers were brilliant and kind people. Our son, Aaron, came home regularly and they made us all feel so cared for. We started to build a strong trust in the team and we felt incredibly safe in their hands.

As Rachel became more and more poorly and sleepy, we started to really appreciate those regular visits. If we had questions, they listened and answered with honesty and compassion. It was good to have these kind, experienced people on our doorstep.

The night Rachel died, a Longfield carer was there. She gently guided us and supported us and I will never forget that kindness.

I’d started counselling with Longfield when Rachel got seriously ill and I had more sessions after she died. So did Aaron. Rach would have been thrilled that he did that. In young male world, it’s not necessarily the thing to do, is it? I was so pleased because I know he had a good experience of counselling with you which means he’s more likely to seek out counselling again if he needs it in the future.”